Escapist Routes #21

The bit where I explain why this newsletter is late

This week’s excuse: I went on a writing retreat! My friends and I rented a giant house in the country for a long weekend, provided ourselves with a vast quantity of food, tea and wine, and hunkered down to write and brainstorm and generally pursue creative work for a few days.

It was a deeply rewarding time—I revisited a project I began in 2021 and then abandoned due to extreme burnout, and had the deeply enjoyable experience of reading my own work and going, “Who wrote this? This is brilliant!”

What I did not do was watch anything—in part because that’s just not how these weekends go, but also because the rural internet was not up to it. The connection out there has vastly improved since the year everyone else logged off and we waited three hours to download the Wonder Woman trailer, but even now, if one person tries to watch a video, the WiFi freaks out and runs away to hide.

Foundation, season 3, episode 4

It’s almost impossible to start analysing a season of Foundation until we’re into its final episodes, but so far we have two Cleons on the run — and a whole scene where Lee Pace gives Lee Pace sass, which is basically what I’m here for — and Gaal scheming her schemes while wearing extremely flattering athleisurewear.

I mean, it’s not just me, right? The Second Foundation looks like a fancy yoga retreat? I suppose that’s fitting, since it started out as Rachel House’s cult in season 2.

Meanwhile, Demerzel continues to be one of the most interesting characters around today. She is, in fact, a genderflipped incarnation of R. Daneel Shaw, a character who turned up in nearly everything Asimov wrote, and I cannot imagine how angry Creepy Uncle Isaac would be if he knew his creation had been turned into a woman, and was part of a plot exploring faith, guilt, repentance and rebirth. Can robots dream of electric gods? I love that Foundation asks these questions, even though I also know the answers will inevitably be “Yes, but” and will probably involve some sort of MacGuffin.

Smoke, episode 7

Our intrepid team made it exactly one episode before Gudsen figures out he’s suspected of the many arsons he actually committed.

I’m not really surprised that they tipped their hand. First, for some reason the investigation is being led by John Leguizamo, ex-cop-turned-pornographer, and I cannot tell you how illegal that feels. Second, the strategy includes things like “Anna Chlumsky pretends to be a literary agent while Detective Michelle attempts to befriend Gudsen’s wife and ex-wife”. (This, of course, involves some breasting boobily at the gym, and I am once again making inquiries as to the sports bra used in this production.)

But we do get to dig down into Gudsen’s motivations. Spoilers, he’s a misogynistic asshole who thinks white men are oppressed by DEI. Also, his mother probably didn’t love him — at least, that’s the theory propounded by Freddie The Other Arsonist, who is now in prison and refusing to speak to anyone but the man who arrested him.

Hey, maybe Freddie should be leading the investig— no, wait, he just died by suicide, in what has to be the most alarmingly romanticised depiction of hanging since Star Trek: Picard’s woeful second season. Can someone please tell the streaming services that there are guides to responsibly depicting suicide? At least AppleTV+ has heard of content warnings.

Everyone in this show is terrible except Detective Michelle and Gudsen’s estranged wife. Unexpectedly, the title of Worst People this week actually goes to Michelle’s siblings, who are all, “Why are you making such a big deal about the abusive mother who tried to murder you being out on parole? Bygones, sis! Don’t be a bitch!” Apparently you can suck without setting a single fire!

Untamed, season 1

It turns out that Untamed (Netflix, 2025) is completely unrelated to The Untamed (Tencent Video, 2019), the Cdrama based on a boylove comic that my entire Tumblr dash went mad for a few years ago. I can’t pretend I wasn’t confused when I saw people, who would not normally watch a queer Cdrama, talking about Untamed.

Then my flatmate sent me an excerpt of a review that said, “This show is mediocre, but the scenery and mountains are nice.” And let me tell you, we are big fans of mountains in our house. So obviously we had to give it a crack.

Untamed is a fresh entry in a very specific genre: Eric Bana Solves Crime In A National Forest. He loves a national park, our Eric. As far as this category goes, Untamed is no The Dry 2: Force of Nature. It’s an okay way to spend a few evenings, but aside from its setting — Yellowstone Forest — it’s very Cop Show By Numbers.

Our Eric plays a cop who is sad and drinks too much, because his son was murdered and his marriage failed. He’s actively suicidal and fairly bad at his job, but he’s also The Only Man Who Can Solve This One. This One being the murder of a manic pixie dream girl who was thrown off the top of El Capitan, aka The Mountain From The Opening Scenes Of Star Trek V: The Final Frontier.

(My flatmate, when I said this, said, “I should make you watch Free Solo.”

“You did,” I told her, “but that’s still not where I know that mountain from.”)

The mystery encompasses a missing child, drug trafficking, police intimidation of some dirty but mostly harmless hippies, a sketchy wildlife manager, Sam Neill looking paternal and concerned, and more. Because this is a cop show set in California, the LAPD are also among the bad guys — Eric’s reluctant partner is freshly transferred from LA in an attempt to escape her abusive ex, a cop.

Untamed is at its best when it explores the work that goes into making a national park work, from the wankers in management to the people who keep the trees growing and the animals from eating people. Unfortunately, those moments come few and far between, and this story could be set anywhere. That’s a real shame, because the public servants who work in America’s national parks are under threat, and the series could have been a love letter to them. It’s a missed opportunity to highlight their work.

But the scenery and mountains are nice.